Breaking News: D Rose return imminent

Joelseppi of No Bulljive is reporting that Derrick Rose will absolutely return for #thereturn this Monday to return against the Denver Nuggets for a return to basketball…return-style.  The signs are obvious and not in any way a loose conspiracy.  Fact:  The staff of No Bulljive bought 6 tickets for the game Monday.  Fact: The mother of No Bulljive’s creator flew in yesterday from Phoenix and is attending the game Monday.  Fact: The infant son of reporter Joelseppi had Bulls onsies bought for him today in anticipation of the game on Monday.  Fact:  During a recent practice, Rose was able to turn, then turn again, which by definition is a “re-turn”.  Fiction: a source close to the Bulls and D Rose told us directly that Rose will return for sure against the Nuggets.

Early favorites for Tuesday newspaper headlines are:  Return-A-Bull 3-1, Return of the Jedi 5-1, Return of the King 5-1, Return to Oz 7-1, Return of the Living Dead 10-1, Return of the Mack 12-1, Return Already you Hasbeen 220-1, A headline not featuring the word “Return” 14,000-1, He Has Rosen 14,001-1.

“I’m returning to there.  This Monday.  And you can take that…to the bank.”

About joelseppi

Joelseppi Chmara chose to become a Liverpool fan seven years after they won their last league title. His impeccable timing has led to this Liverpool era being dubbed, "The Polished Turd Generation." Joel is also an unashamed patriot of the US Mens National team and cannot stand when second generation Americans root for their ancestors' country over the Stars and Stripes. His favorite player is Sami Hyypia. His least favorite player is a tie between Paul Konchesky, John Terry and Marco Materazzi. His future favorite player is Xander Halas Chmara. Joel is married to soccer-mom-to-be, Beth Anne, who is very tolerant of his obsession with the beautiful game.
This entry was posted in #thereturn, Chicago Bulls, Derrick Rose, Injuries and tagged , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

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