Drink: Manhattan, rocks
Yes, the Miami Heat needed overtime to score 86 points tonight. To be fair, that extra period only provided two made free throws. Let’s play a little Jeopardy!
Question: Sweet Jesus, is there any better failure than a Miami meltdown?
We could start this out with the story of the game (from a Bulls angle), but let us lean positive-like, shall we? The Bulls played some orgasmic team ball to topple the three NBA starters the Heat can boast. I believe Thibs locked down his second consecutive Coach of the Year Award with this win, as (story of the game spoiler alert) the Bulls heart and soul was completely noneffective.
Your Chicago Bulls simply play defense very, very well and Thibs is committed to that D. He is willing to go with very offensively questionable line-ups for the sake of D. Taj: 28 mins, Asik: 22, Brewer: 20, Thibs don’t give a shit. He will rely on D and rebounds (which was a surprisingly even battle that the Bulls edged at 45-41), and let the offense… offense itself. It sure played into his hand that Watson was able to put up 16 (on 6-10 FG) and Korver carried on his crazy run with 17 (on 5-6 3 FG?!). If Korver keeps this up, I may have to start liking him. [Darth Varder, Episode III, “NOOOOOOOOO!!!!”] What did not exactly play into his hand was a certain reigning MVP… [collar tug]
(clever pun* about Rose being a flower not in bloom or something) Jesus, Mary, Rose, and Joseph – Da Rose had a… um,
forgettable awful Sucker Punch wretched very ungood night. Derrick Rose went 1-13 from the field with three turnovers in 25 minutes. Yuppers, 25 minutes. That is what happens when you look like you are sabotaging your squad on the court. If this was an Italian soccer league in ’06, there would be a full investigation into his performance. (Have I lost most of ya?) Steve Kerr – of all people – brought up a great point (after Rose had been vomiting on the ball for a few quarters), in that, beyond Rose’s negligent shooting, when Da Rose was on the court, the ball largely stopped with him, instead of the fluid passing that happened with Mr. CJ Watson. (comma) I have maraschino-cheery-sized doubt that Rose will not get back to his former messiah-like self in the playoffs (barring injury), but this game was humbling for Chicago’s current superstar. Luckily, the Bulls next three opponents are the Pistons, Wizards, and Bobbycats – meaning he has three games to warm up until next Thursday’s match-up versus these very same Heat.
On a side note, I found it a touch disheartening that Da Rose was so unemotional on bench between timeouts – late in the game. Noah and Boozer always get up when the reserves get big and carry the team – chest bumping and such. Yet, when Rose was on the bench and there was a timeout after a huge sequence/play, he seemed awfully reserved and not very congratulatory toward his overachieving teammates. I understand that he was super pissed at his own performance and I only had limited camera angles, but it kind of seemed like a punk move.
Gary Busey Says From the beginning, the Super Mario Bros (NES) castle soundtrack was in my head. I have to image that it has to do with Bosh looking like a dinosaur, with the obvious Bowser link. … Outside of injuries, the most concerning aspect from the Bulls is the disconnect between Rose and Rip. Rip is showing signs of his potential on this team over the last few games – but that potential has not yet coincided with Rose being on the floor. The aforementioned next three contests are a wonderful time to get the two to get to know each other, share some quiche, a few espressos, and talk about Oprah. … When LBJ touched the ball for extended periods of time, the UC faithful booed. Yet, the same did not happen for Wade. This is troubling for me. I understand that Wade is a Chicago native and that LBJ “snubbed” the Bulls for the Heat, but Wade is a way bigger bitch than LBJ. LBJ is just kind of a douchey, wonderfully gifted child that sometimes says things that make you wonder if he is semi-slow. Wade, on the other hand, is possibly the league’s biggest nancy. He flops like crazy, hams up injures, HAMS up injuries, HAMS UP INJURIES, complains excessively, sometimes acts like he is injured when he is not, is generally whiny, and he plays up injuries from time to time. (Did you catch the finger-flick Omer gave him in OT? I was concerned Wade was going to need reconstructive surgery after that massive blow to the face.) Point is: Wade is sally, boo him more than LBJ. … The Heat have been lately going with non-Wade&LBJ line-ups to start the second quarter and such. I sure hope they keep this up, as it is a great offensively inept way to give up the court. … The Bulls shot 57.9% FT, the Heat: 62.5%, way to go, two ECF locks! … Much is going to be made (or has been made) of the Bulls insane bench production. They killed the Heat’s bench 47-7 PTS. Let us keep calm heads, as we have to remember that benches play a much smaller role in the post season. Games drift and stretch over weeks and benches become less of a factor. Yes, it is great that Thibs has a deep bench to form many different looks throughout the game, BUT the playoffs are reliant on your top talent, and the Heat still have the best player in the league and a whiny bitch that can come huge at times, like Wade did in the 4th. … And finally, during the 3rd, I began wondering just how shitty Rose’s +/- could get in this contest. Turns out he put up a much deserved -27. Meanwhile, CJ had a +38. Clearly this means Da Rose needs to grab some bench.
*oxymoron – puns are the devil wrapped in olives