Oh, these are exciting times we live in! The Chicago Bulls, fresh off of their drive to the Eastern Conference Finals, have two picks in the first round of this years NBA Draft. What’s more is all they need is ONE solid starting shooting guard to complete their roster and put them over the edge. Logic will tell you that two cracks at finding this elite shooting guard is more than enough to fill out their starting line-up and conquer the basketball world, right? Sure.
The Bulls enter this year’s draft with the 28th and 30th picks. In a normal year these picks would not be optimal, and this is hardly a normal year. Everyone is proclaiming this draft to be anywhere from terrible to the worst draft in the Age of Man. That certainly does not bode well for the kind of talent hanging around in the late first round of the apocalypse draft to crack a rotation that Thibs seemed quite set upon last season. Yet, what happens if the roster shakes up a bit? Well, with the CBA talks that are set to go down (most likely restricting the Bulls already limited salary cap) and Gar Paxman saying things like, “It’s a young team that we feel can still grow together moving forward,” I would not put much stock in the Bulls roster changing much at all. Additionally, if the roster were to change via trade, you would think that one, if not both, pick(s) would be involved in the trade (if not for value, then to simply move them). However, the sly Gar Paxman has indicated that the Bulls will keep these picks and use them to, um, shag balls during shoot around? You may be reading this thinking, “So does that mean the Bulls will not find their shooting guard this draft? Will there be no Christmas?” Don’t you worry, it is even less hopeful as I have made it out to be, as no one projects any worth while shooting guards (and that is relative to this shitpool class!) to be available when the 28th and 30th picks come a callin’.
Ergo, with its lack of talent and the Bulls lack of sexy picks, this may be a draft to skip and read about the next day. Fear not, Bulls fans, I will have my whiskey next to me as I watch the draft (so you do not have to) and offer the very best in drunken analysis. You lucky duck!