Drink: Sprecher Winter Brew
Going into this full tilt boogie vs. the last team to knock off the Bulls, I was still fuming over Kwame Brown’s busted ass clocking The Beard. That added to the fact that former Bull Kirk “Running Under the Basket without Passing or Shooting is my Signature Move” Hinrich was given much cred for stopping D Rose the last time these two teams met, meant I was gonna watch this match with surly booze in my veins. I tried to write this review while heavily tipsy, but it didn’t turn out too well.*
The game saw the return of Kurt “I’m gettin’ too old for this shit” Thomas/Murtaugh to the starting line-up. With Horace Grant in attendance, Kurt went role player maximus with 13 boards. He was the ultimate YMCA gamer with two early set-shots to keep the Bulls up early. Murtaugh even had a crafty moment where he stripped the ball off of Joe Johnson to the dismay of the 37 Hawks fans in this country watching the game. All-Star Al Horford, who played with Joakim Noah in college and together surely tried to smoke a basketball at some point, started well enough, but petered out quickly. An injured Luol Deng rawked out 10 first quarter points leaving the Bulls with a 2 point lead after one.
Jamal Crawford scored enough points in the first half to make you realize that there are plenty of players who score with a meaningless effect in an NBA game. Rose had a couple of sweet ass drives to give Stacy King memorable hard-ons. Horford, whose last name is a term for a woman who has sex in the back of a Mustang, had 5 first-half assists? It seemed like the Bulls were in control, but at the half they were down 50-48.
At this point, you knew the Bulls were just making the Hawks feel like they were special little fellas and would decimate the ATL in half number two. That’s exactly what happened. Josh Smith, best known for dunks and… celebrations, didn’t realize the Bulls were an actual NBA juggernaut and made two insultingly stupid passes leading to turnovers that sparked a Bulls cushion. D Rose went hard to the rack and added a couple of threes in route to an 18-point quarter. As Rose destroyed the Hawks with a Bulls 24-10 tilt in the 3rd, coach Larry Drew had to be wondering how the ATL could stop this year’s obvious MVP.
The 4th saw the Bulls finish off the Hawks with little trouble. Brewer and Watson were fluid and D Rose’s only moment of adversity was when an initial 3-ball was ruled a 2 after further review. He even broke Jeff Teague’s ankles late in the game setting up Rasual Butler for a three.
In the end, this was a defensive clinic. Any clinic that doesn’t result in an STD treatment is one helluva night. The Bulls coasted against a play-off squad and with a Celtics loss are now just a half game back of the conference lead with a 46-18 record.
*Hoobity doobie doo. I lovw you grandma. iknoww I don’t call you inuff, but I neverno whatda say, but u no I’m still your favriate. emember how i liked the bulls when iwasa kid and dAD was lkie “Im nt puttin no hoop in th drivewaaaaaaaaaaaay cuz you wont yous itt and you dfeendit me. well gues whut? the buuuus are good egin so i wanna hoopin wherr i lives now. uhh ooo, the hawwks jus hit a 3, sun va biggch, this sucks. i lovee u. waitminute. u don have aphone. whoiz dissssssssss?