Team USA, A-OK!

Derrick Rose and Team USA will be kicking off their conquest of the World (via Turkey) tomorrow! Follow the action live or DVR it and watch it at your leisure. The first round kicks off with a rough schedule of five games in six days. More difficult is the fact that the three consecutive games before their one-day break are much more difficult than the remaining two. Regardless, it is time to game-up because this is like the World Cup of basketball. So you can imagine what that means to your typical American citizen: Indifference!

First Round Schedule (all times are in Central Standard)

Saturday – 11AM, ESPN Classic (or 10PM, ESPN2) – USA vs Croatia: Toni Kukoc has long since retired. This should be a walk in the park (Does Turkey have parks?) for the red, white, and blue.

Sunday – 8:30AM, ESPN2 – USA vs Slovenia: Last year, USA’s GDP was approximately 290 times that of Slovenia. I doubt the former Yugoslavs will even be able to buy a bucket.

Monday – 1:30PM, ESPN – USA vs Brasil: Known for their futbol, Brasil packs a punch when it comes to the court. Lead by NBA players Leandro Barbosa and Anderson Varejao, Brasil also sports what looks to be the Spurs starting center this year in Tiago Splitter (bonus points on a wicked name). This should be Team USA’s first significant challenge.

Tuesday – Nap (and Skittle) time for Team USA.

Wednesday – 11AM, ESPN – USA vs Iran: The US conducts some foreign policy by demonstrating what a war would look like if Iran doesn’t get rid of their nuclear program and fall in line. Expect the US to win by 40 behind Rose and Durrant’s triple doubles.

Thursday – 8:30AM, ESPN2 – USA vs Tunisia: The US will see if they can top Wednesday’s 40-point victory.

About Judas Pato

Just another hard working member of the press, covering the Chicago Bulls and nonsense - often both, simultaneously.
This entry was posted in Age of Rose, Derrick Rose and tagged , . Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to Team USA, A-OK!

  1. goodluckjanine says:

    Are the times listed ET? CST? The most important part was left out, poor article.

    • Judas Pato says:

      Updated. You know, I kept thinking of where to put that information and in the end it slipped my mind. I must have had the luxurious Plaza on my mind. Sorry.

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